Of all the periods in the development of children, adolescence is the most difficult period. Nothing suits the child, everything you say makes him roll his eyes, hormones are disturbing his reason and ability to make correct decisions, friends are more important than family and generally you pray to God that your teen will pass safely through these years. So, here are ten important tips when dealing with teens.
1. Your teen doesn’t want you to be friends
They need to know that you are responsible models on which to they can rely and respect, not some parents who think they are cool and wear jeans too tight or shirts with inscriptions like “Alcohol is life”.
2. Do not stand in contradiction with the teen during discussions
If he wants to debate, he should enter politics. But if you’re trying to follow and fight his “logic” with logical arguments, you will end up talking in vain without any result. Teens need to know that no means no. Remember when your child was two years old and his answer was NO? Well, now it’s your turn, especially when your child wants to behave dangerous or might affect his future in terms of socially, academically or professionally.
3. Do not buy your teen a car
If you violate this rule, your child will crash it in record time, that if you’re lucky and he doesn’t completely destroy it. The teenager has to work to get money for a car, or at least for part of the car.
4. Encourage participation in sports, even if your teen is clumsy
Some sports can be practiced even by the less coordinated. Participation in sports develops perseverance and team spirit. In addition, you will always know where your child is every day after school. Show him that you care: go to the games and encourage him loudly from the stands.
5. Make yourself known by the teachers
Get involved in extra-curricular activities, offer to watch a ball or a trip, get involved in arranging a dance hall, offer to help with snacks and sweets.
6. Your teen needs house rules
Otherwise, he will become lazy and his room will come to resemble a homeless shelter. It’s good to give him some household tasks, so he knows what his responsibility are, like taking out the garbage, cleaning his own room, walking the dog, washing the dishes etc. Some more good rules: eating is only done in the kitchen, he can’t receive guests over without there being an adult in the house, insults are forbidden.
7. Your teen must work
Provided that school and academic activities give him enough time. Left on their own, tens can easily become lazy teenagers and sit in front of the computer an entire day. So, find them something to do, no matter how much it pays: working at the corner kiosk, making shopping for the elderly, arranging boxes in the supermarket, helping a trainer give swimming lessons children. Anything is welcomed and will help train an accountable child with work ethic and sense of duty to family.
8. To know the needs of your child, you must first meet his friends
Teens have secret lives and the parent’s responsibility is to penetrate the Iron Curtain that protects their secrets. If you want to know what your child better, try to know his friends. How? In a warm and friendly manner, ask questions that do not sound like questioning, but rather pull information, without him realizing it.
9. Look at your everyday teenager, even insist on it
Notice any change in his appearance, personal hygiene, in mood. Interact daily with him on a deeper level than “did you take the garbage out?”.
10. Teens may feel afraid or ashamed
Be aware that if your teen has done something wrong, he may be too embarrassed or too afraid to tell you about. Even if you have a wonderful relationship with him, or you believe you do, he will have a hard time confessing something, fearing that you will be disappointed.